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Olding
By Sara Olding
Reflecting on our experiences and making adjustments is the only way to keep growing. My students surely tire of hearing this throughout the year as I challenge them to put their thoughts into journal writing and then polished writing. Experiences shape us and change us and help us understand the world.
This year, in Senior English at Sidney High School, students spent time reflecting on experiences that helped them grow. They have considered the places they’ve been, the problems they’ve solved, the disappointments they’ve rebounded from, and the moments they’ve celebrated. They have not only reflected on big moments, but they have considered how smaller moments have mattered too. Over the last few months students from the SHS class of 2024 shared thoughtful reflections of their own experiences in the Sidney Daily News. Again this year the community feedback for the series was empowering for these young writers just beginning to find their voices.
I guess turnabout is fair play, because last week they challenged me to come up with some reflections of my own and share them at their Baccalaureate Celebration. Maybe a fitting way to finish the series this year is to share the message that I wrote for the class of 2024.
Dear Seniors:
Graduation asks us all to reflect on what the years have taught us. You are realizing now that while the days are long- years are short. You recognize that collectively we have unlimited gifts, but only limited time. So, what of our time together? What will you actually remember about the years you spent at Sidney High School?
Time has a way of showing us what really matters. I know you will remember the friendships you’ve made, but I hope you will also remember the powerful lessons that only experience can teach you. If you spent time in my class, many of these thoughts live in your journals. Keep writing! Keep collecting experiences and making adjustments. With that in mind, I have four pieces of advice to help you as you leave high school and begin your next chapter.
No. 1 There are no shortcuts to any place worth going
We live in a world of apps and QR codes and 7 second Tik Tok videos and Instagram reels that promise transformation. I am here to remind you that there is no substitute for hard work and dedication. There are no shortcuts to any place worth going. If something is really important to you, commit to it and be prepared to sacrifice for it.
If you want to get better – practice. Think of the things that you are most proud of. For some it is an academic accomplishment, for others it might be an athletic achievement or a goal met in music or art- the pride comes from the sacrifices you made and the work you did. Think of the relationships that are most important to you. My guess is that you value the people who have taken the time to invest in you not only on your good days, but on your bad days too.
There is no shortcut to goodness. There is no easy way out — but don’t let that frighten you because it is actually a beautiful thing. Look at how much you learn about yourself when you commit to doing the work. Look at all of the potential you found when you decided to commit to something and see it through. As you move into the next phase of your life, be wary of shortcuts. They won’t lead you to the same place that hard work and dedication will.
No. 2 Keep your truth tellers close
Accountability is an uncomfortable thing. The majority of people look to blame someone else when things go wrong. Blame is a blanket that gets bigger and bigger every time you pass it around. Trying to figure out why someone else is at fault when something goes wrong often feels like a national pastime. This is why it is important to have truth tellers in your life. A truth teller is a friend who is going to tell you the uncomfortable truth, even when it stings.
It is easy to surround yourself with people who tell you how great you are and how nothing could ever be your fault. We often disguise this as loyalty. Real loyalty is a friend who will tell you the truth about a situation, even when you are in the wrong, and then stand with you as you try to correct it. The older I get, the more I rely on the truth tellers in my life. Truth tellers hold you to a higher standard because they see your potential. They are tough on you because they believe in you. Find people who will hold you accountable and keep them close. And remember, if it is always someone else’s fault, even your English teacher knows that math doesn’t make sense.
No. 3 Make connections
I love to ask students what they think the key to happiness is. Many students suppose that making a ton of money will make them happy. The truth of it is that there is a study spanning eight decades about living a happy life. This Harvard Study of Adult Development began in 1938 with 724 participants and now follows more than 1,300 descendents of the original group.
What researchers have found is that human connection is key to happiness — not the artificial likes you get on Facebook, but true, in person connection. Visiting your grandmother, talking to someone in line at the grocery, dinner with friends, a genuine connection with other people — this is the key. You all have given that to me every day at Sidney High School. Showing up for you— having a purpose and making connections has brought me happiness year after year.
You have also taught me a great deal about family. Remember that showing empathy for others makes you a better human and that family is not just who you are related to, but those who choose to sit next to you each day. Build a life that allows you to do that. If you truly want to find happiness, do something for someone else who could never pay you back. Happiness lives there and in every other meaningful connection you make. Stop taking selfies, put your phones down, and appreciate the beauty in the people around you. Despite what the world tells you— most people are pretty great if you give them the chance to be.
No. 4 Look for the light
The world is going to come at you pretty fast after you graduate. There is an old German Proverb that states: “Joy and sorrow are your next door neighbors.” Try to remember that because you never know which one is going to come knocking on your door unannounced — but there is light in both of them if you look for it. Success and failures are inevitable too— but again there is light there. I will tell you what I believe.
I believe that there is light in each of us. Each of us has been given a light and it is up to us to decide how we are called to use it. Twenty eight years ago when I stepped into a classroom I realized — unequivocally — what my light was for. My light is for you. Its purpose is to help you find your path in the world, to draw attention to your gifts- be it because you couldn’t find them on your own or because you were afraid that others would judge you for them or maybe you couldn’t imagine their worth.
You have taught me that my purpose is to show up each day and shine a light on your potential, to challenge you to reach a little further than your comfort zone, to hold you to a higher expectation, to help you harness the power of your own light. You have taught me that if I am willing to use my light in the name of serving others — that my light only gets brighter and my purpose clearer. You have taught me that in lifting others —we all rise.
Class of 2024, go out into this world and fill all of the dark corners with your light. And when life challenges you, and it will, when you question what you are worth or if this business about light is real- you call me, come home for a day and I will use my light to remind you once more of how lucky the world is that you exist. Congratulations— I could not love you more.
Sara Olding is a teacher at Sidney High School. She lives in Sidney with her husband, Bryan and son, CJ. She collaborates with Miami University each summer for the Ohio Writing Project. This summer she is looking forward to reading, writing, traveling, hiking and spending time with family.